The personal cook decided to sleep through the morning last Sunday. That left us with a distressing situation of epic proportions. My kids and I had no breakfast. So I rolled up my sleeves and did the responsible thing. Cook breakfast myself. Gasp! I know. That was unprecedented but I managed to come up with this:
That was only after filling our apartment with smoke and endangering the internal organs of my kids with this:
Now I know you should never use plain stainless steel pans for pancakes. Cook pancakes only with polytetrafluoroethylene-coated pans. Say it with me, polytetraflu…blah. This unwieldy word that escapes pronunciation is more commonly known by the brand name Teflon. Really though, Teflon is to polytetraflu…blah as Colgate is to toothpaste.
That got me thinking. We never had non-stick pans in my mother’s house. How come her pancakes all looked peachy? I asked her and she said she used a brass pan that was non-stick. She isn’t so old as to remember what folks from the Stone Age used.
The nice looking pancakes were served to his royal highness so he wouldn’t think I was such a useless wife. I brought the plate to the bedroom and pretended to serve him breakfast in bed, but he didn’t buy it. He knew that the only way he could intentionally get such a loving gesture was if aliens kidnapped me and replaced me with a clone that was so diseased it had a sweet disposition. In short, he discovered my kitchen crime.
There was enough pancake mix left so I could cook nice looking ones for the kids. Guess who got stuck with the ugly ones? Nothing goes to waste in our house so I closed my eyes and swallowed. The maple syrup got me through the ordeal.
Jan’s Quip: “You cooked pancakes. You shouldn’t feel worn out after cooking pancakes.”
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